Father's Day - without dad
Father’s Day can be a heartwarming celebration for many families but for a bereaved child, it may bring a wave of sadness, confusion or isolation. At Mosaic, we support children and young people coping with the death of a parent or loved one across Dorset and we know how emotional this time of year can be.
Whether the loss is recent or many years ago, Father’s Day can be a painful reminder of absence. Shops, schools and social media are filled with images of happy dads and families, something bereaved children may no longer have.
If you’re a parent, carer, teacher or family friend, here’s a compassionate guide to supporting a grieving child on Father’s Day with practical ideas and emotional support suggestions.
Acknowledge That Father’s Day May Be Difficult
Avoiding the subject might feel like the easy option but most children appreciate it when someone recognises their loss. Saying something as simple as, “I know Father’s Day might feel a bit hard, do you want to talk about it?” can give a child permission to share their feelings.
Acknowledging grief in children helps them feel seen and supported. It sends a clear message: it’s okay to be sad, angry, confused or a mixture of everything.
Let the Child Decide What They Need
Every child feels grief differently. Some children may want to honour Father’s Day with a memory or activity. Others might prefer to ignore it entirely and treat it like any other day.
There’s no right or wrong approach. Let the child take the lead by saying something like:
“Would you like to do something to remember your dad or just have a normal day?”
Giving them control can help them feel safer and more secure.
Suggest Gentle Ways to Remember Dad
For children who want to remember their dad or another male role model, simple rituals can provide comfort and connection. Some thoughtful ideas include:
- Writing a card or letter to their dad
- Creating a memory box or scrapbook
- Lighting a candle in his honour
- Cooking or eating his favourite meal
- Visiting a special place they shared
- Drawing a picture or crafting something together
These Father’s Day remembrance activities can help children process their grief through creativity, reflection and storytelling.
Talk to the School Ahead of Time
Bereaved children in school may find Father’s Day especially difficult if their classmates are making cards or writing poems. Letting teachers or staff know in advance gives them the chance to offer an alternative activity or check in with the child sensitively.
Teachers should never assume that all children have an active father figure. Being aware of family circumstances helps create an inclusive, supportive environment for every child.
Encourage Conversations and Memories
Children may find comfort in talking about their dad, even years after he died. Sharing memories, both happy and sad, can help a child process emotions and stay connected to the person they’ve lost.
You might ask:
“What do you miss most about your dad?” or
“Can you remember something funny he used to say?”
These conversations help keep memories alive and remind the child that it’s okay to talk about grief.
Support Emotional Ups and Downs
Grief is not a straight line, especially for children. They might laugh one moment and cry the next. They may feel guilty for enjoying parts of the day or feel pressure to be “strong.”
Let them know that every feeling is valid. It’s okay to miss someone and still enjoy the sunshine. It’s okay to cry and also to laugh.
Father’s Day can be a time for reflection, remembrance and resilience, not just sadness.
Take Care of Yourself Too
If you’re also grieving the loss of a partner or loved one, Father’s Day may stir up your own feelings. It’s important to care for your own wellbeing while supporting a grieving child. Talk to a friend, counsellor or support service if you need space to share your own emotions.
Remember, you don’t have to have all the answers. Just being present, listening and offering love can mean everything to a child who is grieving.
Reach Out for Professional Support
Father’s Day will always be different for a child who has lost their dad. But with patience, love and the right support, they can move through the day in a way that feels right for them.
Whether they want to talk, remember, cry or carry on as normal, what matters most is that they feel safe, heard and never alone.
At Mosaic, we provide professional support for bereaved children and young people in Dorset through:
- One-to-one counselling
- Activity days and community events
- Bereavement groups
If a child you know is struggling with grief, or if you’d like to learn more about how to help them navigate their grief going forward, please get in touch.